Five Things You Haven't Learned About Me Yet | Being Jane

Thursday, August 28, 2014

Five Things You Haven't Learned About Me Yet

It's possible there are things I haven't divulged to you yet in my 18 months of blogging. I figured I would address some not-so-well-known things about me in hopes that you would be able to see more of what makes me who I am today!

1. I grew up in a Christian home, accepted The Lord as my savior personally when I was 4 (and I knew exactly why I was praying that prayer), and I chose to be baptized at 11. I was completely immersed in my faith at 16 years old thanks to an amazing worship pastor who shepherded me through some tough years. Honestly, by 18 I was struggling to keep up the facade with the life I was leading outside of church, and the life I tried to keep up in church. Today I am happy to say that my faith is once again a large part of my days and my involvement in church mirrors my life at home. It's truly wonderful to feel centered in that regard!

2. My dad passed away from esophageal cancer three weeks after I turned fifteen years old. It was sudden and although the doctors gave him six months to a year to live after his diagnosis, he went after a month. His passing caused a major negative turn in my life and the way that I dealt with my grief over my best friend passing away was not a good one. I shoved my emotions down and I didn't cry for 8 years.

3. I was dropped on my head as an infant and I am convinced that is why I am normal today ;) ...... Or am I? Ha!

4. As a child and throughout my younger adolescent years I likes to play detective. It didn't matter where I was or what was going on, there was always a covert mission going on. Maybe it was how to snag the grapes from the refrigerator without anyone discovering me. Often I would take my tape recorder and record my missions through the grocery store. I remember one time I was taking down the license plate of a VW bus in the 99 Cent Store parking lot and I continued to search for mysterious characters inside the store because I was sure the perpetrator was around. This explains my obsession with Nancy Drew, Mandie's books, and the Boxcar Children!

5. Due to my teenage spiral of negative choices, I lost my virginity when I was 18. This was NOT my plan for my future and shortly after I was devastated and ruining my promise to God to save myself for marriage. I had worn the ring "true love waits" all through high school, I read the books, I had sayings written on my bulletin board and in my Bible... And I distinctly remember throwing my ring across the street when all this went down. I was so broken and ashamed with myself. I am blessed with an amazing husband who makes me feel valued and beautiful, and even though my younger experiences with sex were not positive, my husband has reignited my self-worth. From the moment we met he was such a different man than the kind I had chosen in high school and later. Through his words and actions, commitment to me, and support, he has renewed how I look at myself and I feel appreciated. 

A lot of this goes to show you that things don't always go how you think they will. People die, diseases and illnesses can take your loved ones. You might break your own promises to yourself. Your detective ways may never leave your heart :)

At least with me, there has been a HUGE, BRIGHT light farther down my tunnel of life and I am so blessed and pleased with my marriage and two children. I thank God continuously for holding me through dark times and protecting me. And I'm glad He has helped me keep my zest for life and creativity alive!

1 comment:

  1. My dad is currently ill. He has COPD and while it's his own fault for smoking sometimes its rough on me. He rarely have a relationship and it's never been a good one, but its still hard knowing that one day he won't be here. I'm sorry for your loss. I can't imagine being so young and knowing how to actually deal with that! I also relate a lot to your last confession. I "lost" my virginity when I was 15. It wasn't "real" sex and I feel like it was more take from me because of things, but it still affects me today. I think it also affected choices I made in college with my ex. All of it still majorly affects my life and my marriage. It's hard and I hate it, but I think God uses it. Thanks for sharing!