Guilt. | Being Jane

Thursday, September 19, 2013

Guilt.

For the past two weeks I have been dealing with extreme mommy-guilt. Being 33 weeks pregnant, I am getting so uncomfortable... well, I have been uncomfortable since about 28 weeks to be honest. My body didn't plump up as much as it did when I was pregnant with Emma and so everything feels very tight, heavy, and Audrey likes to stretch and push on me a lot.

Anywho, back to the guilt train. Emma is so active and smart (I think I say that out of being a biased parent but having worked in the child development field for so long I am pretty sure she is smart, ha) that I feel terrible having zero energy, zero strength, and zero stamina. Like today for instance, every time I stand up Braxton Hick's contractions happen. I didn't have any of that with Emma's pregnancy, and I even had a bout of real contractions two weeks ago that freaked me out. Apparently they were non-labor contractions but still, no mom wants to experience those early.

I have deemed today "movie day" but I am sure my guilt will push me to crawl to the playroom and set her up with some craft or art project.

I have 30 days left until I am considered "full-term" at 38 weeks, and 44 days until Audrey's due date. I just don't see me making it until 40 weeks, and I am hoping she comes at 38 weeks (or the latter part of 37 weeks!) My guilt as a mom of a toddler is only going to become more pronounced as I feel heavier and more uncomfortable. Poor Bean.

Did you feel this way with your second/third? What did you do to make it through? Did you make it to your due date?

2 comments:

  1. Some of my Mommies that I worked for has gone through this. The thing that I told them was not to feel guilty because the more you stress your body out the more stress your unborn bean feels. You aren't hurting Emma by doing a "down" month. You do wayyyy more than most Moms do. I know where you are coming from but you need to pray to let this emotion go. This guilt can turn into stress and that stress turns into an uncomfortable baby and Mommy. You may not think that it stresses you out for feeling guilty but Audrey can feel it. For the sake of your growing body, your little baby bean, and your cute Emma bean, just relax and enjoy down time with Emma because soon that will be gone. Try and focus on the small things with Emma. Your life is about to change drastically and you don't want to end your one on one time with Emma stressed.

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  2. My Dearest Darling Daughter - Emma is not going to be scarred or damaged from this short period of non-oogly goggly....really. Self entertainment breeds self sufficiency, to a point. She will be fine. Reading books together may be all you're able to do right now. Wish I was there to take her on adventures so you could sleep. This won't be all of it either, once Audrey gets here you will still feel pooped AND necessarily distracted. : / That is when Emma may start acting out...she will need some planned times just for her and you guys.

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